The Prepare Before You Promise (PBYP), a marriage preparation seminar, aims to equip young adults with Biblical principles and practical tools for building strong and Christ-centered marriages. The seminar provided a platform for 36 participants to reflect on marriage, examine key aspects of relationship-building, and gain wisdom for lifelong commitment. Through engaging sessions, participants were challenged to evaluate their expectations, roles, and responsibilities in marriage while nurturing their spiritual growth.
Day 1: Foundation and Biblical Insights
The first day kicked off with an ice-breaker session that allowed participants to engage in meaningful conversations and get to know each other better. Twenty-five participants were present on day one, creating a vibrant atmosphere. The evening began with prayer and worship, followed by an insightful session led by John Srikanth, who discussed the importance of education in life and marriage preparation.
This was followed by a thought-provoking group activity where participants were divided into five groups and asked to explore the differences between Christian and non-Christian marriages. The exercise resulted in deep, meaningful conversations, helping participants reflect on the Biblical view of marriage and its implications in real life.
The day’s discussions highlighted:
- The importance of education in preparing for marriage.
- Group discussions comparing Christian and non-Christian marriages, emphasizing Biblical values.
Day 2: Biblical Principles and Practical Insights
Eleven other participants joined on the second day, bringing the total to 36 attendees. After breakfast, the group gathered for a full day of impactful sessions.
Devotion by Mr. Premdas
Mr. Premdas, Director of Shining Stars, opened the day with a devotion based on Colossians 1:16 and Matthew 19:4-6, exploring the sanctity of marriage as a divine institution. He emphasized the need for serious preparation for marriage, akin to how one prepares for a career, as marriage is a permanent commitment.
Session 1 by Dr. Samson Gandhi: Marriage as God Intended
Dr. Samson Gandhi began the session by emphasizing the honor and sanctity of marriage, referencing how Jesus Himself attended the wedding at Cana.
He explained that the four key purposes of marriage:
- To uphold each other’s dignity recognizing that both male and female are created equally in the image of God.
- Companionship: Building a deep and meaningful relationship between spouses.
- Sexual Integrity: Upholding purity by avoiding premarital sex, pornography, and extramarital affairs.
- Building a Home: Embracing the blessing of children as God’s gift and considering adoption without hesitation in cases of infertility.
Dr. Gandhi emphasized that misunderstanding the purpose of marriage often leads to its misuse, just as with any other aspect of life.
He concluded by discussing the Biblical principles of marriage, which include:
- Leaving: Transitioning from dependence on parents to mutual interdependence with one’s spouse, making decisions together, and maintaining the exclusivity of the marital relationship.
- Cleaving: Developing a deep and lasting bond with one’s spouse.
- Becoming One Flesh: Establishing unity in every aspect of life, reflecting the spiritual and physical oneness intended by God.
Session 2 by Dr. Samson Gandhi: Pre-Marital Expectations
The session on Premarital Expectations by Dr. Samson Gandhi was truly eye-opening. He explored ten key areas that are vital for a successful marriage:
- Love Expectations: Understanding what love means to each partner. Self-Awareness: Recognizing and addressing one’s strengths and weaknesses.
- Family Dynamics: Navigating expectations related to in-laws and extended family.
- Financial Management: Establishing a clear approach to handling money and finances.
- Sexual Adjustment: Developing a healthy understanding of sex within marriage.
- Communication: Acknowledging its critical role in building a strong relationship.
- Spiritual Growth: Prioritizing personal spiritual development and family devotions.
- Role Expectations: Clarifying and aligning responsibilities within the marriage.
- Emotional Needs: Recognizing that security, self-worth, and significance should ultimately be rooted in God, not solely in one’s spouse.
This session offered profound insights into preparing for a Christ-centered marriage, emphasizing the importance of aligning expectations and relying on God for fulfillment in key life areas.
Session 3 by Dr. Anthony David: Roles and Responsibilities in Marriage
The session on Roles and Responsibilities by Dr. Anthony David highlighted the Biblical foundation of marriage, focusing on Genesis 2:24 as the central verse. He introduced the concept of the “marriage triangle,” illustrating that as both husband and wife draw closer to God, they naturally grow closer to each other.
Dr. David explained the distinct yet complementary roles of husband and wife:
- The husband is called to exercise headship through servant-like leadership, marked by love and care for his wife.
- The wife is encouraged to submit to and respect her husband, fostering harmony in the relationship.
Together, they are to collaborate in making decisions, building a partnership rooted in mutual respect and God’s guidance.
Session 4 by Dr. Anthony David: Communication in Marriage
Dr. David emphasized the importance of effective communication in building stronger marital connections. He covered:
- The Power of Words: Encouraging participants to use words that build up and uplift.
- The “Sandwich” Approach: A strategy for providing constructive feedback in a loving and encouraging manner.
- Non-Verbal Communication: Understanding body language, tone, and facial expressions.
- Conflict Resolution: Learning to address conflicts with grace, using “I” statements to express feelings without blame.
The day ended with a reflective evening, including personal reflections, paired prayer, and a vision-sharing session that invited participants to join small groups to continue their journey with the PBYP workbook. Eighteen participants committed to joining small groups for further growth.
Day 3: Biblical Application and Holistic Insights
The final day began with a devotion by Dr. Hepsibah Chaitanya, who shared a story about how exam preparation not only helped a student succeed academically but also allowed him to help his peers. This illustrated the broader theme of marriage preparation—not only for personal fulfillment but to bless others.
Session 5 by Dr. Anthony David: Sex & Sexuality
Dr. David discussed the sacredness of sex within marriage, addressing:
- Biblical Foundations: Sex as a gift from God, designed to strengthen the marital bond.
- Purity and Boundaries: The importance of maintaining purity before marriage and setting boundaries in relationships.
- Communication in Intimacy: Open dialogue about expectations and needs.
- Emotional and Physical Connection: Sex as an expression of love, unity, and intimacy.
Session 6 by Dr. Anthony David: Understanding God’s Will
This session focused on how to seek God’s guidance in choosing a life partner, with practical tips on:
- Discerning Through Scripture: Aligning decisions with Biblical principles.
- Praying Consistently: Trusting in God’s timing and seeking His guidance.
- Seeking Wise Counsel: Relying on mentors and spiritual leaders.
Session 7 by Mr. Santosh Vennamalla: Male and Female Differences
Mr. Vennamalla highlighted the emotional and psychological differences between men and women, including:
- Emotional Needs: Men value respect; women value love and communication.
- Communication Styles: Men are often solution-oriented, while women prioritize relational connection.
- Conflict Resolution: Understanding the need for both partners to adapt to differing communication styles.
Session 8 by Mr. Santosh Vennamalla: Bride – Groom Hunting
This engaging session provided practical and Biblical insights into the process of finding a life partner. Mr. Vennamalla emphasized that choosing a spouse is a significant decision that should be approached with prayer, wisdom, and intentionality. Key highlights included:
- Biblical Guidance:
- Seek God’s will, prioritizing spiritual compatibility over worldly criteria.
- Look for qualities like integrity, kindness, and faith, exemplified in Biblical characters.
- Self-Preparation:
- Focus on personal growth before seeking a partner.
- Be the kind of person you want to marry.
- Practical Steps:
- Engage in godly environments like church, seminars, and community groups to meet potential partners.
- Use discernment and wisdom in evaluating matches.
- Red Flags to Avoid:
- Be cautious of relationships lacking transparency, mutual respect, or shared values.
- Avoid decisions driven by emotions or external pressures.
- Role of Prayer:
- Commit the process to God through prayer, trusting His timing and plan.
- Pray for clarity and guidance in choosing the right partner.
This session encouraged participants to approach their search for a spouse with faith and patience, emphasizing the importance of building a God-centered relationship.
Question and Answer Session
The seminar culminated with a highly anticipated Q&A session, where participants had the opportunity to ask questions on a variety of topics. The questions ranged from sexual intimacy, virginity, and pre-marital sex to Christian perspectives on relationships, marriage across faiths, attachment issues, and relationship boundaries.
The panel, consisting of Dr. Samson Gandhi, a certified counselor and founder of Person to Person, his wife Mrs. Christine Samson, and Mr. Santosh Vennamalla, provided insightful answers grounded in Biblical wisdom and their personal and counseling experiences. Their responses went beyond the typical advice often found on social media, offering depth, grace, and practical wisdom that addressed the real concerns of participants.
Testimonies
This seminar exceeded my expectations. I’ve gained valuable insights into God’s principles for marriage and the roles of a husband and wife. These teachings are things I wish my parents had access to; they are rarely discussed in such depth.
I now feel better equipped to navigate marriage proposals and make informed decisions based on Biblical principles. The seminar also shed light on how to seek a partner while staying God-centered. Thank you, Stewards of Nations, for organizing this. I’m truly blessed and looking forward to being part of future events.
I came with no expectations, but God spoke to me during this seminar. I learned about the preparation, prayer, and effort needed for marriage. The session on marital challenges was particularly impactful, as it prepared me for potential realities and consequences.
Thank you, John Anna and Hepsi Akka, for making everything so clear. Your efforts are deeply appreciated!
Though I was initially skeptical, I trusted God’s plan and attended this seminar. Each session was rich with Biblical insights. From understanding God’s purpose for marriage to exploring expectations, roles, and communication, every topic was relevant and enlightening.
The seminar reshaped my perspective on marriage and equipped me with practical steps to prepare for it. I hope many more young people will be blessed by this program as I have been.
‘Prepare Before You Promise’ has been a great blessing in my life. The sessions were practical and insightful, addressing doubts about marriage, choosing a partner, and becoming a better future spouse.
I look forward to joining the PBYP small group to continue learning. Thank you, Stewards of Nations, for this opportunity!
I loved the welcoming environment created by the Stewards of Nations team. The sessions by Dr. Samson and Dr. Anthony were amazing, and the interactive activities brought a sense of belonging.
Thank you for organizing such a wonderful programme — I left feeling enriched and inspired.
I came to this seminar with little knowledge about what marriage truly means. But after these sessions, I now understand that marriage is not just about living together, but a commitment to grow spiritually together. This seminar has helped me understand what it truly means to prepare for a Godly marriage.
The sessions were enriching and transformative. I learned the value of knowing my strengths and weaknesses before entering into marriage, as well as the importance of mutual understanding and spiritual growth. This seminar has been a great blessing.
The seminar was an eye-opener for me. I came to understand the depth of the Biblical perspective on marriage and the importance of preparation. It has helped me evaluate my own readiness and commitment for a future marriage, especially understanding the significance of emotional and spiritual growth.
Impact and Feedback
The seminar made a profound impact on participants, equipping them with Biblical insights and practical tools for their journey toward marriage. Many participants expressed gratitude for the transparency and depth of the discussions, which helped them understand not just the spiritual but also the emotional and practical dimensions of marriage.
We express our heartfelt gratitude to our supporters and prayer team, whose unwavering support made this seminar possible. Your contributions have sown seeds that will bear fruit in countless lives, strengthening marriages and families for generations to come. They are going to invest in the best institution since the foundation of earth, which is marriage, beautifully shaping into the second best institution which is family, which are the basic building blocks of a responsible society.
Together, let us continue to prepare the next generation for Christ-centered relationships and marriages.